WIW....Again

 

This week has been a week of looking back. I lost 55 pounds on WW after joining when my youngest daughter was 2 weeks old. That would have been August of 2008. 

I lost that, slowly, reminding myself often of the saying "Slow & Steady Wins the Race." 

I went for months where I never even had a gain, I posted a loss every time....might not have been a big loss but down is always down in my eyes.

I maintained that 55 pound lost for about a year & a half when suddenly my scale started creeping up no matter what I did. I couldn't figure it out & kept trying new things. 

Finally after a year, I started researching my birth control & have recently changed that in hopes that was an issue.

So what did I do? How did I lose that weight that is different from now?

That has been my focus this week.

I worked the plan.

I tracked in my 3 month journal pretty much every day.

I would enjoy a cheat meal, or sometimes it was a day.

I worked out & enjoyed my workout.

I made myself a priority in my "To Do" list every day.

More importantly:

I told myself that every day was a NEW day.

If I screwed up yesterday, it didn't matter anymore, because today was a day to make a better choice.

I was nice & understanding to myself. 

I didn't beat myself up if I screwed up, I accepted I was human & not perfect.

I didn't say mean things to myself, such as "you suck."

Or my current favorite one "you are such a failure."

I didn't look in the mirror & say "Wow, you look FAT."

I looked in the mirror & saw progress, I wasn't looking for perfection.

I sit here currently about 15 pounds up from where I was really maintaining, sure I got lower than that, but I didn't maintain that lower #. 

So what? Get over it! Move forward.

I am quite certain that I'm not the first person in the world of weight lost that has regained some weight. 

So today's WI is up 0.5 from last week, but down 2.8 from where I was when I stepped on the scale on Monday morning. So, yes, I'm happy with that. 

I have done better the past few days planning my food & sticking with it!

I'm not expecting myself to be perfect & I'm not going to deprive myself from things I love. 

I will work them into my plan.

I will pick a cheat meal for the week....(not sure which day this will be yet for this weekend) but it will stop at a meal, not an entire weekend like this last one!

 Because that is how I lost my weight in the first place.

Here's some pics for the week:

We had Easter at my parents on Sunday - we have such beautiful kids!

 

Insanity:

This was the gorgeous sunrise the other morning. Isn't God's art amazing?

 Until Next Time ~

*krisha*

 

WIW...Moving Forward

It's Wednesday again! The week is at the half-way point & for that I'm very thankful!

I'm only going to mention my WI as an "I'm up" but I'm down from where I was on Monday morning so I'm going in the right direction!

This week had its stresses for sure. Friday I ended up spending 12 hours in the ER with my youngest. She ended up with some kind of virus last week and became SERIOUSLY DEHYDRATED. She looked awful, I felt awful. She had some numbers showing on her lab work that were scary & that was potentially pointing at some more serious problems/diseases. However, finally, yesterday her lab work showed improvement & yes, I'm praising God for two healthy girls. Plus, she is still adorable even sick.

I have learned a lot about myself this week. As I mentioned yesterday, I asked myself The Hard Questions this week. Why am I struggling? Why am I choosing things that are awful for me? What am I afraid of? And the list of questions goes on & on. I realized over the weekend that my issues with food do go deeper than I have ever admitted. Looking back I see that on Friday at the hospital. I was stressed, nervous, upset, and all I could think about all day long was food! Any food! When my husband finally brought me food in the evening (this was after not eating a lunch) I ate it so fast I never even tasted it. My mind was thinking, "once I eat this food, I will feel better. I will be more relaxed. It will take away my fear." Obviously, it did none of that. I am depending on food to do things it will NEVER do instead of viewing food as fuel for my body. Fuel in which I can put in the premium fuel or I can put in the fake cheap stuff & always feel like I'm running on empty. 

So, this week's WI might not have the results from last week we all hope for in terms of the scale. But, to me, I do think I've lost.....I've gained a lot of knowledge & insight about myself that I know is going to take me forward. 

Here's a couple pictures from a quick trip this Spring Break weekend - who needs to leave Michigan for some beach fun during Spring Break? Oh wait....I wish we were not in winter coats & gloves. Please spring weather SHOW UP!

Until Next Time ~

*krisha*

Asking the Hard Questions

Why?

Do you have any idea how many times I ask myself this question every single day? I should really count them in a day to see how bad it really is. I seem to have zero self-control lately in any area of life.

I sat myself down & had a very long heart-to-heart talk & found the questions I need to ask myself. 

Why?

Why do I keep sabotaging myself?

Why do I choose the foods that I know are not right?

Why do I choose the foods that will make me feel awful?

Why do I choose to shove the food in my mouth after I tell myself how bad it is?

Why can't I seem to pick something that is healthy or in my calorie/point range?

Why don't I want to feel good?

Why do I pull myself in the opposite direction of success?

Why don't I take a little bit of time in the day to plan to set myself up for success tomorrow?

Why don't I put to use all the tools I have for this healthy lifestyle?

Why don't I see my excuses are only hurting me?

What am I afraid of?

Am I scared to lose it and gain some back again?

Am I afraid I can't lose it so if I don't REALLY try than I didn't fail?

When will I fully realize that food does not make me feel better about myself, a situation or life in general?

When will I realize junk food does not give me energy & that Reese's peanut butter cups are not the answer to the 3:00 afternoon wall I hit?

Why don't I realize the only person I'm cheating or failing is myself?

When will I truly make this a lifestyle versus a diet?

When will I start really living life instead of trying to cover myself up on the sidelines?

But maybe the best question is:

Why don't I believe in myself? 

I've struggled for as long as I can remember with my weight. Okay, not fully in high school because I was so active playing sports. But, even then, I wasn't overweight but always felt so much bigger than most of my friends...partly in thanks to my thunder thighs. I'm starting to realize that my relationship with food is a much bigger problem than I ever did realize. It's time for me to dig deep inside, find my true issues & correct them. 

This will be a long journey...but once I am truly the best me, I can be the best wife, mom, sister......

 

Again, I'm a work in progress searching for the answers.

Until Next Time~

*krisha*

Insanity has Begun!

Yes, you read that correct - I'm insane!  Insanity is kicking my butt! I thought I was in shape at least to some extent, but this program is telling me I was so NOT!

Hubby & I started on Wednesday evening with our Fit Test - yes, this happened to be after hosting a Norwex party & drinking a couple of glasses of wine but he could not wait! So, I bucked up & did the test! Here's what we got:

Switch Kicks - me = 50; Nick = 60
Power Jacks - me = 40; Nick = 48
Power Knees - me = 62; Nick = 85
Power Jumps - me = 21; Nick = 30
Globe Jumps - me = 4; Nick = 6
Suicide Jumps - me = 5; Nick = 10
Push-up Jacks - me = 20 (just jacks); Nick = 18
Low Plank Oblique - me = 23; Nick = 44

The suicide jumps & push-up jacks I had to modify because of my shoulder!  I'm hoping to see some improvement on Day #15 when we re-take it!

Sunday we were scheduled to do Cardio Recovery - which was basically just stretching out & my legs needed that like you could NOT believe! Well, since it was easy workout, hubby suggested we do the next workout. I regretted agreeing to do that about 3 minutes in! WOW - Pure Cardio was EXTREME! But, by the time the workout was over I burned 601 calories! But, I'm not gonna lie, I was hurtin'! My legs were DONE and on FI-YA!

Now- to amp up my food choices this week! I went grocery shopping today & bought lots of healthy snacks & stuff for yummy meals so I can focus on those choices to really help these insane workouts pay off for me! This was dinner last night - DELICIOUS! It's just a chicken breast with some corn, black beans, & salsa with a little cheese on top!

 

What's even more amazing is that I got the hubby to try a salad over the weekend!!! Can you tell he's thrilled?!

 

For a little fun - today was the last day of fun activities for March is Reading Month for my girls. If you can't tell from the pic it's Wacky Wednesday - they were super fired up!! Such fun personalities on these girls!

So for WIW I was down 0.1 - big deal! But I'm okay with it. It's not up & I know my scale might take a while to show off my hard work with Insanity! Not to mention I am more sore than I have ever been in my whole life - I'm finding muscles I didn't even know existed! And....I need to get seriously better at drinking my water again! I've been slacking.

I am also following the cool kids over to Bloglovin:
Follow my blog with Bloglovin

I'm out for now - until next time ~
*krisha* 

WIW....Graduation Week!

It's Hump Day! Yay! Half-way thru the week. I need the weekend right now! I have struggled so much lately with exhaustion & I'm not sure why. Possibly the time change combined with softball starting at the same time. I never sleep really great during softball season because every night my brain won't shut off on how things went, what I need to change, what we need to accomplish the next day, etc. Or maybe it's the depressing weather we are having right now in Michigan:

 

I mean, really? Not Cool, Michigan, NOT COOL!

Well the hubby & I have started an 8 week challenge. We are both going to push hard, weigh-in together & track them all, and eat healthy (for me trying to focus on clean eating) & we shall see who comes out the winner at the end. With that being said, we bit the bullet & ordered Insanity over the weekend. It should be on our porch in the next day or two....YIKES! I am really excited to workout with him. I've tried to get him to workout in the past SO MANY TIMES! Not because he needs to because of health reasons - he's super skinny (in fact right now he weighs 2 pounds less than I do - HATE THAT) but more because he is such a stressful person & I know it could do wonders for his stress level! He's a teacher hoping to soon become an administrator & puts an absolute extreme pressure on himself to be the BEST at everything! He's also completing his Masters project this semester which has been stressful on both of us....I mean, really, this guy has never even got a 'B' before in his life! Which is one of the many things I love about him - such a motivated individual! So, anyway, I'm excited for him to get on board & tone-up with Insanity! I need to lose & tone, he really just needs to tone! There will be days where we can't do it together because of our crazy schedules this time of the year, but most of the time we will! 

So I'm changing things up. Going to rock out Insanity for the next 60 days & will go from there! Today's WI results from last week was down just shy of a pound at 0.9. I will totally take that being this was my first experience again with TOM after having my Mirena removed after a year & a half!

Good news for me, however, is that yesterday after going twice a week since September, I graduated from Physical Therapy! And by "graduate" I mean I left with a HUGE packet of stretches & strength exercises & lots of bands to do at home on my own! I am finally at a place where I can start strengthening my arm - I mean right now the thought of sleeveless tops scares the crap right out of me! My arm is so UGLY between the odd, weak shape it is in & the scars from surgery! So, yes, I took a before picture....but I can't throw that out there until there's a difference! I'm excited. I still have a SUPER LONG ways to go before I can do my passion - throwing a softball (right now I can do little easy/short throws), pitching a softball & swinging a bat! But Someday......

Graduation Gift:

I will forever be a work in progress!

Until Next Time~
*krisha*

WIW....What?

Happy Wednesday ya'all. If you are stopping by today please follow along over there on the right - I'll return the favor! :)

So last week I committed to getting back to the basics. I had a super hectic weekend & week & am seeing that I didn't make the time I needed to prepare to take care of myself. Part of the issue is that I haven't gone grocery shopping in forever! MUST GO SOON!! This weekend we went out of town for a quick get-away & I made zero time or effort in getting in my workouts.

But, with that being said - I must say now that this is my favorite time of the year:

 

Yes, softball practice has started! This is the time of year my life gets crazy, hectic, stressful loaded with lots of fun & something I am passionate about! I get to be even more active at practice every day! The other problem with this is season is that I'm not released from the surgeon or my physical therapist yet to throw a ball or swing a bat - but I will get there! I'm working my big butt off at PT every session & at home - hopefully by the end of the season! 

Anyway, this week, I'm down a smidgen...like 0.2 or 0.4 or something like that. But at the same time, I'm feeling better & my pants feel better so maybe I'm changing & the # on the scale just isn't. Maybe I need to start getting serious about strength training too. Maybe, just maybe, I need to be better at taking my body measurements so when I need the encouragement, I can get it from there!

So, again I'm moving on. This weekend I should be able to get some planning ahead in! The planning was my biggest failure this week - I don't think I planned one meal ahead of time! During my "busy season" I have got to get better at this....so off I go. Pinterest is such an amazing place for meal planning! I'm also going to try to focus on mostly clean recipes! 

This is what I need to change & this is what I am GOING TO CHANGE!

 Until Next Time~

*krisha*

WIW.....Change

It's hump day again & this momma still feels like she got hit by a truck semi with this horrible cold. Honestly, a cold hardly ever slows me down...but this one has seriously kicked me down! So, this week has been zero progress. I haven't even been able to work out since Sunday so my run one mile every day in March hasn't been successful for me but I promised hubby I would make up for it! Not to mention that my food choices have been horrible. Why in the world do I think that eating comfort food when I'm sick is gonna make me feel better? I mean, really, I hardly even have taste buds so what is the point in consuming the calories?

I did do somewhat better yesterday with food choices & today have every bite & taste planned out so that maybe with some kind of miracle tomorrow at my Weight Watchers meeting I can still pull off a loss. Even if it's a small one, down is down in my book!

For today's WIW - I'm up 0.1 from last week to 157.7.  Honestly, I'll take it. But, as Erin over at She's a Big Star talks about today on her blog - I am going back to basics! I had a serious talk with myself laying in bed last night about needing to go back to what I call the "Honeymoon Phase" of this lifestyle. I'm pulling back out all my WW program materials & lighting the fire again!

So in other words - WATCH OUT! I'm coming back! And on that note, I am going to think of this as a re-start. I decided 2 weeks ago at WW to stop thinking about my original starting weight there & forget about how I had lost 57 pounds before gaining some back (still saying thanks to the stupid Mirena). I am restarting with a fresh start weight from my weigh-in 2 weeks ago which was 159. Need that fresh start I think! 

In other news, for some fun this morning! It's March is Reading Month at school this month & they do lots of fun activities. Today, was crazy sock day - and my girls loved it!

 

Starting with going back to basics and the Honeymoon phase - yes, I do have my tracker on my desk right now!  Because to be honest I am super sick of doing this:

Until Next Time~

*krisha*